My Brilliant Financial Advice

I subscribe to LDS Living Magazine's e-newsletters, and every month or so (I think) they have financial advice from that fantastic money guru Dave Ramsey. All the email will show is the question (Dear Dave style), then you click on the link to go to their site and read the answer.

I love reading his advice. He's practical, down-to-earth, and no-nonsense about money. He rocks.

The most recent email had this question:

Dear Dave,
We have five kids under the age of five. We'd like for all of them to be able to go to college, but we're not sure how much it will cost. Our household income in about $90,000 a year, and we have no debt except for our home. What's the best route to go with our college savings plan?
Laura

My first thought was: "Encourage them to get a great education, do well in high school, and get scholarships."

That's our plan anyway. I have two fundamental beliefs about college when it comes to my kids. One: you're going. Two: you're paying for it.

Okay, I don't sound that harsh when I lay it out for my kids, but that's the truth of the matter, and I'd feel the same way even if it were possible for Brian and I to put our three kids through college (it isn't possible, in case you're wondering). That cold, hard financial fact makes it easy for me to tell my kids they're responsible for putting themselves through school without sounding like a big meanie. I believe college is something you earn. Period. It's both a responsibility and an opportunity, and earning it is the best way to make a young mind appreciate what they're being given.

My kids know I had to do it too. I chose to go to a small, private, liberal arts college. Tuition was around $23,000 a year. By the time I graduated, my student loans totalled around $20,000. Scholarships and grants paid for the rest. Three years of college for free just because I decided to learn what I was being taught in high school. Not a bad deal.

You don't have to be brilliant or a straight A student for that to work - or I couldn't have done it myself. You only have to be dedicated and work hard. A supportive mommy doesn't hurt anything either.

So while I have no plans to put money away for my children's college education, I invest plenty by way of encouragement, instruction, and making sure they get a good education at their school. The rest is up to them.

I have complete confidence that they'll be able to pull it off.

If you think I'm off my rocker and want to know what the Fantabulous Dave has to say about it, here's his advice:


Dear Laura,

Whew! Boy, you guys have got a house full and your hands full! You've also got a nice income, and that's going to help a lot. Right now, the most you can put into an Educational Savings Account (ESA) is $2,000 per year. If you did this annually for each kid, you have a little over $100,000 per child when it comes time to send them off to college. Pretty sweet, isn't it? That will buy a good education at just about any state school.

For the first $2,000, an ESA has more flexibility than a 529 plan. They're very similar in how they act, but with an ESA you're in total control of the investment. You can move it around, and put it into almost any mutual fund. If you use the ESA or a 529 for anything other than college you'll get hit with a 15 percent penalty, plus the tax rate, so start brainwashing the kids now; it's for college only!

Dave

Pop Quiz

Happy homeschooling day! We've changed what we're doing a bit - no charts, journaling, or seatwork. Nobody was sad to see that stuff go, including me. (Well, I'd be happy if my kids liked to write more, but they don't, and I have no desire to push it.) We've kept geography (which we're all enjoying), fun learning games, and logic puzzles. So, in honor of another homeschooling day, here's a little pop quiz.


How many countries are in North America?

a. 10
b. 3
c. 23
d. 17


Highlight the text between the arrows to find out the answer:

--->The answer is 23. The countries are: Canada, USA, Mexico, Guatemala, Belize, Honduras, El Salvador, Nicaragua, Costa Rica, Panama, Jamaica, Cuba, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bahamas (these are the ones me and my children know - we haven't yet memorized all the other tiny little countries in the Caribbean which are...), Antigua and Barbuda, St. Kitts and Nevis, Dominica, St. Lucia, Barbados, St. Vincent and the Grenadines, Grenada, Trinidad and Tobago.

Greenland is not technically a country but a province of Denmark, however they've slowly gained more autonomy over the years as they work towards full sovereignty. We've learned where Puerto Rico, US Virgin Islands, British Virgin Islands, and the Cayman Islands are, but these are territories not countries. There are lots of other little Caribbean islands we haven't learned yet which are territories, not countries, but I'm too lazy to list them all!

I also just realized that as I've been quizzing my kids about this we've been including Iceland because it's on our North America maps, but technically Iceland is part of Europe. Oops.

Another weird thing, which I just found out, is that Trinidad and Tobago are considered part of the Caribbean and therefore North America, but those islands used to be attached to South America. Tobago is actually part of a mountain chain that sunk into the sea! Is it just me, or is that cool? <---

I'm curious, did anyone know that off the top of their heads? I know I didn't. :) It's hard to find a good map of North America that doesn't cut off half the Caribbean, so here's a map of most of North America, and a good map of the Caribbean.

Ah-so!

Dunhuang Star Atlas

This is today's APOD. Here's their explanation:

This ancient Chinese map of planet Earth's northern sky is part of the Dunhuang Star Atlas, one of the most impressive documents in the history of astronomy. The oldest complete star atlas known, it dates to the years 649 to 684, discovered at the Silk Road town of Dunhuang in 1907. A recent analysis that examines the accuracy and projections used to make it notes the atlas marks positions of over 1,300 stars and outlines 257 Chinese star groups or asterisms. The star positions in the hand drawn atlas were found to be accurate to within a few degrees. In this example showing the north polar region, a very recognizable Big Dipper, part of the modern constellation Ursa Major, lies along the bottom of the chart. An additional 12 charts depict equatorial regions in 30 degree sections and also include a grouping resembling the modern constellation Orion. The atlas is on display at the British Library in London to celebrate the International Year of Astronomy.

An Unprecedented Event

I just have to share this, as a footnote to my aunt and uncle's visit. My husband does not like cats. Like, at all. He's not cruel to animals of course, but he manages to communicate to the cats he knows that he'd prefer they just stay away. And they do.

For some reason, he's been very tolerant of mom's new kitty, Socks. For those of you who know my husband, you'll understand how shocked I was to see this:

A cat curled up next to my husband, sound asleep, and my husband allowing it. In our 17 years of marriage, I've never seen this.
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This is more the Brian I know:

LOL!

Another Miracle

I can't believe I get to say this, but my mom has been reunited with her other long-lost brother. Can you believe that??

As you might recall, she has three brothers, but for various reasons she hasn't seen any of them since she was in her twenties. The oldest died in the Korean War, Michael was given up for adoption when he was a baby (if you missed the story, you can read about it here), and then there's Freddie. Without going into all the details, suffice it to say that when mom was in her 20's there was an unexpected, painful rift between Freddie and the family. No one's heard from him in over 46 years, and no one ever expected to again.

Well last week, out of nowhere, my mother decided to Google Freddie's name. That led her to a genealogy site where she found posts he's written... looking for her. He's been looking for her for 45 years! Strangely, he didn't remember Michael (even though he was older than my mom when Michael was born), but he saw Michael's name in the genealogy database and was looking for him too. (Lemme tell you, that thrilled Uncle Mike to no end!) :)

Uncle Freddie has been living in Niagara Falls, NY (of all places) with his wife of 36 years, Moira. Freddie says she's the best thing that ever happened to him - his angel - and we all agree. They have no children and she's an only child, so they've both felt a bit of the family void. Freddie's felt it intensely. All these years he's had no pictures of his mother, his siblings, or even of himself when he was younger. He found out his mother passed away when he saw it on the genealogy website and he was just devastated. Honestly, it breaks my heart to think about it.

When he realized he finally found his sister, when he picked up the phone to call her, he was shaking like a leaf. He was worried she'd still be mad at him, but when she answered "Helllooooo" in that sisterly way he remembered, he knew it was okay. My mother said it was like they never skipped a beat.

When my mother told me where he lived, my first thought was "Man, we'll never see him." But as it turned out, he and Aunt Moira happened to have a trip to Las Vegas already planned and booked, for this week. The plan was to fly in Tuesday and drive down Wednesday.

One week. That's all we had to wait to see him again. Oh man.

Originally they were going to stay one night, drive back up Thursday, and then fly home Saturday as planned. Then he was going to fly back here and spend some time. I was not surprised that plans quickly changed so they could stay here basically for the duration of their "Las Vegas" trip, drive back up Saturday so Aunt Moira could fly home while Freddie stayed on for awhile. (Uncle Freddie robbed the cradle, so she's a young chick who has to work on Monday and isn't retired yet like he is.) ;)

This is how that week went: mom and Uncle Freddie talked on the phone at least twice a day, she sometimes would call him before he went to bed to say goodnight so he could sleep, he couldn't sleep anyway, Uncle Freddie and Uncle Michael talked several times, mom talked to Aunt Moira (who by this time was used to seeing Uncle Freddie on the phone to AZ), I got to talk to Uncle Freddie too (but only for a few minutes because man alive did mom ever want her phone back!), Freddie told pretty much everyone in Niagara Falls that he finally found his sister, and he lost fifteen pounds because his stomach was in such knots he could hardly eat.

When the day finally arrived, I went to mom's to wait with her. (Uncle Michael couldn't be there because he'd just had yet another surgery on his knee, and since it was the middle of the week my sister would have to wait until Friday to see them.) Uncle Freddie kept us apprised of his progress, and when we knew he was close we went outside to wait:

That says it all, doesn't it?

I gave Aunt Moira a hug first, and then she and I waited:

While Mom and Uncle Freddie kept right on hugging:

It still brings tears to my eyes.

We finally went in and introduced the kids.

Aunt Moira and I took a picture together.

I discovered Aunt Moira has good taste in shoes (not to mention pretty feet).

Mom and Freddie hugged.

We went outside to help them bring in their luggage. Like an idiot, I left my camera inside and missed Aunt Moira giving my mom these beautiful flowers.

Aunt Moira said they're for her new sister. Oh man, an angel is right.

We took some more pictures.

New sisters.

Mom and Freddie hugged.

Mom showed them the pictures throughout her house.

(Here he's getting a close look at Grandma holding her first grandson, many years ago. This was when Freddie told the story about going on the internet and finding out she had passed.)

Looking at pictures of the reunion with Uncle Michael.

(Big brother Gene. He's always been way up on a pedestal in our family, and it brought me a lot of satisfaction to hear Freddie describe Gene as the "brother of all brothers." It wasn't just little sister who idolized him... everyone did.)

After pictures... Mom and Freddie hugged.





And this was when it hit me.


All this time I was so certain I knew how this reunion would be, because heck man we'd been down this road before. We're old hats at this! I knew the reality of it wouldn't hit me till he was there in the flesh, just like with Uncle Michael. I knew there'd be the 20-minute hug at the beginning. I knew we'd look at all the pictures. I thought I knew it all.


But that's where the similarities ended. When Mom leaned on Uncle Freddie like this and he said "Boy, does this bring back memories," and she said, "Oh yeah, I used to lean on him all the time." I thought, "I don't know anything about their relationship at all!"


I was about to find out.


Turns out, my mom and her brother were very close. Like, best friend close. They were like that growing up, and when mom was 18(ish) they moved into an apartment in Portland which they shared for four years. They hung out together all the time.


I had no idea.


As I watched these two swapping stories (oh man, the stories! - there'll be more on that later), I swear I saw 20 years drain from their faces. You could see how close they were - and still are. It was a revelation to me.


At one point Uncle Freddie was talking, and I just sat there watching his face, wondering what my life would've been like if he'd been around.


(Hilarious, for one, in case you want to know. He truly cracks me up.)


But I felt the loss of my uncle. I felt the loss of my aunt, the Amazing But Completely Unassuming Moira. If I was feeling that loss, what must Mom and Freddie have felt? It felt like such a senseless waste to me. (I really wasn't prepared for how this was going to make me feel. That night I think Uncle Freddie got his first good night's sleep in weeks, but I woke up at 3 am and couldn't go back to sleep for a couple of hours because I just kept thinking about it all.)


Later in the evening, I had the chance to talk to him more about how all this has felt to him, along with some other things in our family history. I love how open he is about his feelings. I really do. I love that I could talk to him about how all this feels from the get go. He's a warm, open person and I love him already.

It's been an amazing time.

We spent lots of time Wednesday and Thursday visiting.

Uncle Freddie collects lots of things (too many things, Aunt Moira would say), and one of the things he collects is Mickey Mouse stuff. This is Mom giving him her Mickey Mouse hat. Freddie brought pictures of his collection all displayed in their basement. The other two themes are cars - oh boy, does Freddie like cars - and Marilyn Monroe. There's more than that though.

Friday, we gathered at IHOP so Uncle Freddie and Aunt Moira could meet my sister Wendy and her family.

Thursday, Uncle Freddie suggested I needed some sort of theme to replace the feet. Oh no, no, no. The feet are here to stay.

Uncle Freddie, Mom, and Ben

Besides, if it weren't for the feet trend on my blog, I promise you I'd never get my sister to do this:

Ah, my foot collection is complete. ;)

Right now Aunt Moira is back in Niagara Falls (or possibly still on her way - it's a looooong flight!) and Uncle Freddie and Mom are staying the night in Vegas. Tomorrow, they're driving to San Diego to spend time with Uncle Michael. How I wish I could be there for that reunion!!! I told them (repeatedly) to take lots and lots of pictures.

When they get back, we'll still have about a week before Uncle Freddie goes back home. I don't know when we'll see him next, but I have a feeling it won't be long. Which is a good thing, because I have lots of time to make up for with my aunt and uncle.

Meanwhile, I'm so happy my mom has her brother back, and that he has her.

School is in Session

Sort of.

This summer we're doing something a little different. Even though I'm pretty big on keeping summers unstructured, every Tuesday for a little more than half the day, the kids and I are playing school.

That might sound like a big project, but other than the initial preparation, it's been easy and fun. Since the kids and I enjoy it, it's been a good bonding experience. And since I feel like my kids are already getting a great education at their schools, anything else I add onto it is just a bonus, so there's no pressure there either.

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Dirty faces are acceptable:

Hmmm, I guess it's hard to see, but trust me, his face was dirty.

Dry hair is optional:

Tomorrow is the third time we'll be doing it, so here's a little snippet about the first two Tuesdays.

The goal is to start school at 8:30. (The first week we were a little late, but last week we did better.)

We start with the pledge, putting out the flag, and a prayer. (At the end of our first day, I asked the kids how they liked it. John and Chris both gave me an "Awesome!" but Ben said "So, so." "Uh oh," I thought. "Which parts didn't you like?" I asked. "The pledge," he said. For Pete's Sake. Chris seconded that, but I think he was just saying that because Ben was saying it. So we only do the Pledge every other week. If I were really homeschooling them, the Pledge would not be an option. But for this, I really don't care.)

They each have a folder, a small notebook that we use for journal prompts, and a three subject notebook for work. Here they are, ready to go:



They do "seatwork" which I've put in their folders ahead of time, while I pull them aside one at a time to go over the goal charts:

The charts are one of the things I planned we're not following through on like I'd hoped, but that's okay. We're keeping what works and letting the rest go. Another thing I planned was a "Person of the Week" lesson, but by the time I get to that part of the schedule, I'm feeling done.

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Anyway, after seat work we have 10 minutes for journaling. When we're finished they can share if they like, but they don't have to. (So far, they've been excited to share.)

Then we do a Geography lesson. Academically, this is the only area I'd say I have goals in. But since my goal is "I want them to have a mental picture of the world before they hit high school," there's really not a lot of pressure. So far they know the continents, oceans and seas, (I actually taught them this last September, so this was just review the first week) and we've discussed basic geography stuff like longitude, latitude, the equator, arctic/anarctic circles, etc. My plan is to study countries one region at a time, not moving on until we've mastered where we're at.

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Right now we're working on North America. I expect we'll be in North America for awhile. Tomorrow I plan on reading them a couple children's books about Canada and Mexico, and watching a children's video about the Caribbean. I want them to have some sense of what these places are like, in addition to knowing their place on a map.

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They also each get a filled in map and corrresponding blank map which they put in different sections in their 3-section notebooks. They're building their own atlases which they can also use as a study tool as we progress.

Following the Geography lesson, we do some sort of active game, followed by recess. Here's a pic from a game we played last week. I put numbers 1-20 around the yard, and then several strips of paper in a bowl with a series of numbers on them (i.e. "8 - 17 - 3") and they'd have to race to those numbers. It was good sequencing work for Chris and just fun for John and Ben. I've kept the cards and plan on creating variations of this. (I'm thinking math equations, where they have to run to the answer, or questions like, how many continents are there, etc.)

After recess I let them have a snack while we play the table top game. They LOVE this. This is their chance to test their geography knowledge, and earn points. Earn enough points, get a "book buck." Later this summer I'll take them to the used book store to "spend" their bucks.

After this it's usually lunch time. After lunch we'll work a logic problem together, and then do some sort of activity. Last week we did a fun art project using prompts.

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I separated the kids so they couldn't see what the others were doing, then I gave instructions like "draw four lines from one edge to any other edge" and "draw four circles" etc. It was fun to see how different the finished products were:

When Daddy got home, he wanted to do it too before he saw what theirs looked like.

We enjoyed this project so much, we're doing it again tomorrow. I collected two "prompts" from everybody, so it will be different. This time I'm playing too.

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We're generally done around 1:00 or so. I've told the kids to plan on 3:00, just in case. Last week we took a "field trip" to the library after school. I originally had more ambitious field trips in mind, but we'll see if we actually do them or not. :)

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Anyway, getting ready from week to week doesn't really take me that long. Less than an hour, I'd say. So it's just been a fun thing for us to do. Once school starts, I'll still give them a 30 minute geography lesson and do a table top game (which they're very excited about). Me too. I'd like my kids to really know their geography. I'm refreshing my knowledge too, while we're at it. :)

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So that's our big activity this summer. A LOT more than we usually do (which is nothing). ;)