The Last New Year

I love that song by Tim McGraw, "Live Like You Were Dying."


He said I was in my early forties, with a lot of life before me
And one moment came that stopped me on a dime
I spent most of the next days, looking at the x-rays
Talking bout' the options and talking bout' sweet times.
I asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end
How's it hit 'cha when you get that kind of news?
Man what did ya do?
He said

I went skydiving
I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chew
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denyin'
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin'

He said I was finally the husband, that most the time I wasn't
And I became a friend, a friend would like to have
And all of a sudden goin' fishin, wasn't such an imposition
And I went three times that year I lost my dad
Well I finally read the good book, and I took a good long hard look
At what I'd do if I could do it all again
And then

I went skydiving
I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denyin'
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin'

Every time I hear this song I find myself wondering, "What would I do if I knew I was dying?" (Well, dying much sooner than planned, that is.)

I don't think there's any way to really know what you would do unless you're in that situation, but I like the message of the song. It got me thinking about stuff I'd like to do before I die, priorities I'd like to keep straight once and for all, dreams I'd like to chase, and relationships I'd like to nourish better.

If this were my last New Year's Eve, and I knew that, what changes would I make? What current obstacles would cease to be obstacles? What current projects would fall off the map?

It's been interesting to think about, and a little disheartening that some obstacles really are obstacles.


No matter how you slice it, I do not have the means to travel to Italy. *sigh* Nor do I have control over whether or not I become a bestselling author. *double sigh*

But.



I can decide to see more of the interesting things here in my own backyard. Brian and I have yet to drive the Old Apache Trail even though we've been talking about it for months. It's supposed to be a pretty drive, and I'd like to see it.



I can continue to work on my writing goals and I can take comfort in the fact that I have jumped into that publishing arena, even if I haven't published yet. It took a lot of courage for me to write and submit a book to bona fide New York agents. Sometime in 2010, I'll tackle that goal once again.

As for the people who matter to me, I'd like to take better care of those relationships. That's not a new goal. But I think I can do better. So I'll just have to keep working on that and accept the fact that I'll never be the perfect mother, wife, daughter, sister, or friend. But being perfect isn't the goal, so I guess I'm okay there.

Love deeper. Speak sweeter.

And go to Italy.

What would you do?