Mindfulness Insomnia Remedy

Today I came across an interesting article at a blog called Healthy Fellow. It's about trying to cure insomnia with mindfulness techniques. There's even been a study done with impressive results. (Click here for the article.) This caught my attention for a couple of reasons. First, I know a fellow who struggles with insomnia, in spite of medications (I sometimes have a hard time falling asleep myself). Second, the whole concept of "mindfulness" has been brought to my attention a lot during the past several months. What I was told is that it's important to be "in the moment" when you do things. Instead of thinking of the next five things you have to do, focus on what you're doing now, what you're experiencing now.

I gotta say, it's been a struggle for me. The times I've tried it, it's been nice. I'm able to enjoy the simplest things more when I'm actually paying attention to what I'm doing. It makes enough of a difference that I've come to have the sneaking suspicion that that's what life is. Moments. That's all. And if I'm constantly thinking about future moments instead of living current moments, I'm missing out on a large part of life.

This isn't a natural state of mind for me though. My mind tends to go, go, go. All the time. When I'm working on a task, more often than not, I'm thinking about getting to the end instead of enjoying the journey getting there. My "mindfulness" awareness tends not to last more than a few minutes then I slip back into my old ways. I've made improvements over the last few months, but it's been difficult.

I want to slow down, not just in terms of my daily routine and obligations, but in terms of how I think and feel on the inside. A simple life appeals to me. I love the idea of being calm and centered, enjoying the moment. So why do I keep working against myself? Why do I keep giving myself so much to do?

The end of the article gives an example of a simple meditation, 5-15 minutes morning and night. I've never connected meditation with mindfulness before, but it makes sense. I've heard regular practice yields a calmer mind, less stress, fewer tense muscles (don't even get me started on tense muscles - it's like on the subconscious level I'm in a constant state of "flight or fight").

Anyway, I read the meditation and it looked easy enough. I want to say I'm going to do it. But I wonder if I really will. About a month ago I returned to the library three meditation CDs that had been sitting on my nightstand for 12 weeks - the longest you can check something out at the library - and I only listened to one of them. Twice. For the three months I had those CDs, I told myself "I'm going to do it, I need to do it." But I didn't.

.

What is it that makes me hesitate? What is it that makes me feel nervous about it? It's like deep down I just can't handle the idea of letting go of that "fight or flight" mode. Why?

I don't know. But I'm going to try it anyway.

I think.